DON'T YOU JUST LOVE MISUNDERSTANDINGS...!!!
ANOTHER PIECE OF FLASH.
DEUH………
Destiny.Mid calls.
I love my new ring tone and let
it play.
Caller not in my address book.
Finally. Reluctantly. I answer.
“Hi, Jane. It’s Mark. You know, Sarah’s friend?”
(I don’t, but I think he’s the
dork who shadows Sarah’s every move.)
“Oh, hi, yeh, course, Mark. How
are you?”
“Great, thanks. I’m sure you’re
wondering why I’m calling?”
(Put me out of my misery, Mark. Fingers crossed this isn’t about a date.
Will kill Sarah.)
“It’s just that Sarah told me you just got one of those Japanese yokes, and I was
thinking of buying one too. But they’re a bit expensive, so I thought
I’d do some research.”
(Research? It only cost about a tenner. Was right about him. Dork!)
“Oh I get it! A review.Yeh. It’s
great.Worth every cent.”
“ Easily assembled?”
(!!!!!) “It usually comes
assembled, Mark.”
“ Cool! User friendly?”
(Is he ticking boxes?)
“Very. Simple. No snags at all. And
adaptable.”
“Adaptable? Really?”
( No box for adaptable.)
“Well, versatile. You can put anything in it.”
(Like vegetables, chicken, stir
fry, fish….food, Mark, food.)
“You use it for storage???”
“Storage? Well, actually, now
that you mention it. I could. Never thought of that though.”
(Who the hell stores anything in
a wok?)
“I heard that they’re hard?”
(Well deuh!!)
“Very hard.”
“Isn’t that a problem?”
“I wouldn’t fancy if it buckled
under pressure.”
(You know from heat,Mark, heat!) “Would you?”
“Oh, I get you!”
(Deuh)
“Go for it, Mark!” (Be reckless.)
“Doesn’t it take up a lot of space?”
(He’s got to be kidding!)
“ Space, no! You can fit it in
anywhere.”
“Sounds cool. I suppose you’ve
taken up eating Japanese?”
“Goes with the territory.”
“Cool! How much did it cost, Jane, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Can’t remember. But Lidl sometimes do them. Or try Tescos.”
“You bought it in Lidl???”
“ Actually Aldi.You can buy
up market if you like, Mark. But twenty euro max is enough to pay.”
“Twenty euro for a futon?”
" Who’s talking about
futons? I thought you meant a wok!"
"A wok? But they're Chinese Jane! Deuh!"
Copyright with Cathy Leonard 2016
And I kept thinking, "should I tell Cathy that woks are Chinese, not Japanese" and "but how do I say it delicately?".
ReplyDeleteLove the punchline "Twenty euro for a futon?"