The Shopping List
They have a neat hand
I'll say that for them
and are very precise about their toilet paper,
it has to be 3 ply,
and the kitchen roll must be Blitz
and the pedal bin bags must be white,
I think they usually are anyway.
And at least at the start of the outing
they think in terms of categories,
each row of items signaling an aisle
negotiated as if it were a bunny slope
in the grand piste that is our supermarket.
And they don't do indulgence,
apart from the crisps, not identified,
and the Miwadi, orange and pineapple.
The bread has to be McCambridge
but the apples are left to chance,
so much for Pink Ladies,
and the milk ditto-
can be any brand with any fat content.
The scallions must be large,
I didn't know we had a choice,
and there's a word that looks like bottle
between the ham and the cinnamon
and here our shopper, perhaps inebriated
at the prospect of a dram, veers off-piste
And the trolley begins to carve its way
from Frozen Goods to Household to Bakery,
shredding at speed over moguls
and black runs and fall lines
coming skilfully to a halt at -
the Steradent tablets, Active Plus
So someone with dentures
Someone of my vintage
Someone who forgets to take their shopping list home
Whereas I forget to bring mine to the shops.
Copyright 2025 Cathy Leonard
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